Have Handbasket,Will Travel....

by Raine Wynd and Dana Woods

One evening, as was our usual habit of the time, Dana Woods and I were on IM. Usually, Amand-r was on with us, but on this particular evening late July 1999, she wasn't, so we sent this conversation to her later. She thought it was as funny as...well, you know. As a result of her posting this on her page as well as an earlier conversation with Jam-wired, she earned a place in the handbasket....

Raine: I am not having fun writing this Connor/Nick story. It's going to be an angsty one, I can tell....
Dana: angst is good
Raine yeah, but I dunno...I think I went in expecting to write something else.
Dana:Ooh ooh! I know, i know!! This situation calls for a "Touched By An Angel" xover!!!!
Raine how???
Dana: [Teary eyed Monica, with the light of God highlighting her red hair]: God loves you, Nick, even if you have to do despicable things to survive.
Raine: LOL!!! Oh, I couldn't. You'd hear my retching over my keyboard all the way to PA and NY.
Dana: As this Dove of peace flies upwards, so will your soul, into the loving arms of the Father!
Monica [visibly crying now, but looking no less angelic]: "Just open your heart to the Game, Nick, and you shall be set free."
Nick [Angst-o-rama]:"What room is there for love when there can be only One?"
Raine: Nick: "But...but...this doesn't make any sense!!!"
Dana: Monica [smiling mysteriously]: There will never be only One, because God will always be there.
Raine: Monica: "It's not for us to question God's will...you just have to believe."
Dana: Nick: But---
Raine: Then the light brightens, and Monica starts to glow....
Dana: Monica {aggravated}: Look at the freaking dove and cry. Stop whining.
Raine: and Nick's jaw drops.... and then Monica reaches for him, saying, "See?" and then there's this big het sex scene....
Dana: : LOL Say it with me: We're going to Hell.
Raine:We are going to Hell... ::snickers::
Dana: In a handbasket
Raine: with flowers on the sides...and a bumper sticker that says "I came. I saw. I came again."
Dana: That is US
Raine:<g> isn't it though??
Dana: so true.

Then Amand-r brought in Tianyu (aka Pointy) to the party when Dana and I were trying to convince Amand-r she is a goddess of Methos....

Dana: I will be your Messiah.
Raine: We're going to hell in a handbasket anyway, so we might as well be preaching a Gospel of some sort. We'll call it the Holy Triumvirate, Verse 1.
Dana: you are a goddess, Raine, and don't let anyone tell you you're not.
Raine: Okay. If you say so.
Dana: Amand-r, you should take a lesson from Raine. She doesn't argue, she accepts.
Raine: And then I throw beanie babies at the screen.
Amand-r: ::snort::

Tianyu: Dare anything. Like that game show.
Raine: Are you sure you wanna do that with us?
Amand-r: I am uh, like the angelic mists that swirl around God's head.
Tianyu: You mean the weed smoke?
Dana Anne 1: no no no no no...that is not the game to play with the 3 of us, Pointy. Pointy earned a place in our handbasket with his "weed smoke" comment.
Tianyu: Hand basket?
Raine: He's the anchor.
Amand-r : Welcome to the handbasket, Pointy. He is the emergency brake.
Tianyu: This is a dubious honor..! The emergency brake that you forget to release!

Then things got more interesting....

Dana: So you're just reading fic, then?
Raine: yeah. Trying not to think too deeply.
Dana:Just relax and sink into the fic. Let it distract you.
Raine: trying, chica, I'm trying.
Dana: I shall distract you! I shall write you a haiku!
Raine: No! No haiku! please!
Dana:
We're going to Hell
In a cozy handbasket
Cheer the hell up, bitch!
Raine: Thanks...:-) Hell in a handbasket, huh?
Dana: As long as you realize the beauty of my haiku, I'm am okay
Raine: Oh, absolutely. You and me and all the muses we can stuff in that basket are going. Hey, did we ever decide what color that basket was?
Dana : The basket should be....black, with freaky red designs.
Raine: Hmm. Nah. I want to paint it with angel wings and halos. Just because.
Dana: ooh! That rocks!
Raine: <g>Yeah, and then we can sing all the corniest songs about finding heaven on the way down.
Dana: hehe

Then Chuck joined us in January 2000:

Chuck: OK Jesus ...Let's rock
Amand-r: Yes, my son?
Chuck: Jesus you leave Mandy alone. Put her back on IM!
Amand-r: Now now, is that any way to talk to the Lamb of God?
Chuck: Lamb of God? I'll show you Lamb of God! Where's my mint jelly???
Amand-r: Side Note: I wonder if we could go to hell for impersonating God. Like going to jail for impersonating a cop.
Chuck: Side note: I think we were going to hell long before this, so it is unimportant at this point.
Amand-r: So true.
Chuck: one more thing to the list. if we get enough demerits you think we'll get the VIP passes and drink tickets?
Amand-r: what list?
Chuck: the list of things for which we are going to hell
Amand-r: Hrm. I dunno.
Chuck: It's good to have goals
Amand-r: Ya gotta have goals. Pas the Blood of God. NOW it is official. Jesus has just put me on his shit list.
Chuck: we doin' the blood with salt and lemon?
Amand-r: Naw, on the rocks.
Chuck: Cool, a toast! Here's to Jesus, Tastes great! Less Filling!
Amand-r: Say hey, what color handbasket do you want? Powder blue?
Chuck: I want a plaid one.
Amand-r: Done and done....OLE!
Chuck: OLE!!!

Erin joined us four days later. We're not sharing that conversation; you'd really think we're twisted then.

Now that you're probably convinced we're all insane, shall I take you back to the index? Really, we're just having fun....

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