Written after the pilot episode and before the second aired. :-) No sex here -- maybe that'll be my next trick. Part 1 of the Ruminations and Plans trilogy. Slash, Steve/Danny.
Ruminations in the Dark
by Raine Wynd
Steve wandered through the house, feeling like a weird sort of outsider: it was his house now, but some parts of it were indelibly his dad's still. Among other things, Steve didn't feel comfortable taking over the master bedroom -- not yet, not until he got rid of the bed, packed up his dad's stuff, and in general, remade that room into his. The notion of sleeping where his parents had slept weirded him out, and so he'd stuck to the guest room instead. It had once been his bedroom, but sometime while he'd been away it had been transformed.
He was restless. The Navy had taught him how to suck up pain, how to get by without pain killers, but the end result was that he couldn't sleep. He kept thinking about the way the mission had turned out, analyzing it the way he'd been taught, too well aware he should've used more finesse, more stealth, maybe even a little more planning...and he kept getting distracted by thoughts of his new partner.
Dangerous to think about how sexy tenaciousness could be. Dangerous to think about the ways he could help Danny put order to his chaos, just to get to know him better, get a little closer. Steve knew how to sublimate his desires; knew how to get them filled, too, but it didn't stop the wanting, especially this late at night, when he was alone in the house he'd grown up in, remembering how he'd dreamed of the day he could get out, be someone who wasn't John McGarrett's son, be somewhat more anonymous. Hawaii had felt like a small town while he was growing up; he'd wanted so much to leave.
Instead, he'd made a name for himself, excelling at being one of the few to earn the right to be called a Navy SEAL. He'd never thought that in trying to prove to himself that he was the toughest, most macho, most *guy* man he knew that all he'd wind up doing is building the best damned closet, or that he'd discover he liked both sexes for different reasons. He'd been right in thinking the Navy would take him places...he just hadn't thought just how diverse his education would become, or how the Navy could teach him just how fine a focus he could have on something -- or someone -- he wanted.
If I was smart, I'd find some willing tourist to take home, he thought irritatedly.
But he didn't move to the door, didn't pick up his keys. He knew he was already figuring out the angles to win Danny's affection...and a lot more, if Danny was willing. Patience and planning had been drilled into Steve by masters...he could wait.
For a little while anyway.
The End 9/24/10
Continued in No Plan Like Mine